A Street-Smart Guide to Coffee, Keys, and Crypto

The first coin I got was at two in the morning. The chart was yelling. My mind was too. I was high on hopeium and hit “buy”; when I woke up, it had taken a 30% drop. Lesson one: prices can change faster than your cup of coffee will wake you up. Better late than overly eager. crypto

Keys are important. Those are IOUs — if an exchange has your coins, it owes you those coins. With a self-custody wallet, you are the custodian. Record the seed phrase on paper. Two copies. Different places. No pictures. No clouds. No “I’ll remember.” You won’t. If you have a lot of money, use a hardware wallet. A fun idea is to place a daily maximum spending limit.

Such exchanges can be valuable but check out the fine print. Fees are hidden in spreads. Withdrawals may take a little longer during spikes. Send a test. Little by little, start and build up. Enable 2FA (through an app or hardware key). People can steal SMS codes. Yes, even yours.

Chains are like cities. Bitcoin moves slowly but steadily. Ethereum gets expensive when it’s busy. Layer 2s are like subways: They are cheaper, faster and occasionally break down. Solana runs away, then stops, then runs away again. Bridges are potholes with sharks in them. Only cross if you have to, and check the real contract, not a fake.

Now, scams wear tuxedos. Airdrop bait. False help. “Teams for recovering money.” If someone slithers into your messages first, it’s likely a trap. Never share a seed phrase. Refuse to click on requests for random asks for signatures. Review approvals and rescind old ones. Bookmark official sites. Read the agreement to yourself aloud before you sign it. It’s a brake on the dumb craving.

You’re smarter than your FOMO. Choose why you have a token. Tech? Money coming in? Story? No thesis, no sale. Have your sizes arranged so that a bad coin will not make or break your month. Expect things to go wrong. For real. It happens 70% of the time. Cash at hand makes you think, not twitch. Dollar-cost averaging seems like a dull thing. The truth is, boring is often the best.

DeFi can be lucrative, but DeFi can also be DeFi can be rewarding, but it can also be painful to your bottom line. Liquidity pools seem awesome — until temporary loss starts to eat into your profits. Staking offers you returns, but smart contracts can fail. Audits are helpful, but it’s still a hazard. Usually a stunning number is miraculous-numbers syndrome is nothing more than a mirage. Begin with only limited amounts in sandboxes. Familiarize yourself with the knobs before turning them.

Stablecoins are not all created equal. USDC depends on banks. There is a great deal of history and contention around USDT. DAI combines models. Sometimes pegs break. If you have lots of money, spread your stable risk. Write out everything that you do. Details are important to taxes. And export your CSVs early, not at 11:58 p.m. on the day you file.

Good habits Save money. Stay current with your wallets. Keep crypto in a clean browser profile only. Keys for hardware exchanges. Keys arrive in a separate email. And my buddy reminds me of this rule every time we have a green candle: “Slow is smooth.” Smooth means profit.